One of my clients, a mom of three children, two of which are in foster care, has reminded me that just ‘being there’ can make a lot of difference.

The children in foster care have had multiple issues with the foster parent that resulted in a lot of tension. One instance, the foster mom had requested the older child to give up her cell phone and she called her mom to complain. The child was extremely upset which made her mom feel powerless in this situation. While things like this happen, it often resolves peacefully. The mom could not reach her assigned case worker from another agency and I happened to be in the office when she called us at Adoption Option. She was very concerned and wanted action taken right away. I spent time with her listening and acknowledging her feelings. I reminded her that she was so close to reunification and that she should keep her eye on the prize, so to speak.

It is a time of tension for families to be separated, but the goal is always to reunify and strengthen the family. I reminded her of that and soon she was more calm and that while that was a stressful time, the next day would be better. Things did resolve, as they often do. Later that night, she texted me saying “Thank you so much for being there for me and my girls, I didn’t know who else to call and I knew you’d be understanding.”

This came as a bit of a surprise to me in the moment because when we hung up the phone earlier I was feeling a little defeated as it felt like there really was not much I could do to help the situation. Receiving that text confirmed for me that there are ways that I can make a difference even if it may not always feel like it in the moment.

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